How to fix a broken marriage? Well, while divorce is something of a last resort. People suffering from a broken marriage often ask how to fix a broken marriage. There is no obvious answer to this question as everyone is different. Many people are not willing to try out some of the basic steps that can help in fixing a broken marriage.
Marriage counseling is one of the important and most effective solutions how to fix a broken marriage. But, there are many who consider this to be embarrassing or weak and do not try it out. Similarly, there are people who will try out marriage counseling but would not implement the steps.
Believe it or not, there are even cases of people not realizing that they are in a broken marriage. These people just ignore their partners and the toxicity in their marriage increases. As a result, the trust is not quite there and eventually, there is no other option but to end the marriage.
If you also think that you may be in a broken marriage, this blog is the right place for you. In this blog, I will address how to fix a broken marriage. I will cover the most effective steps that you can try and try to rekindle your marriage.
Table of Contents
Common Causes For A Broken Marriage
Before we look at how to fix a broken marriage, it is important to know what are some of the reasons for a broken marriage. Knowing these reasons will help you in identifying and fixing your marriage before it is too late.
1. Lack of Communication
It is a well-known fact that communication is key in any relationship. Therefore, lack of communication is one of the biggest reasons for a broken marriage. If there is a lack of communication, people tend to keep stuff inside. This as a result leads to resentment and frustration.
2. Cheating In The Relationship
Infidelity is the biggest reason relationships end. If one half of a marriage commits infidelity then it is very hard for the other half to overcome that.
All the truth that you have built in your relationship breaks. Even if you do try to forgive them, it takes a lot of time and healing to overcome all this.
3. Being Cold
As any relationship begins, there is a so-called honeymoon period. Eventually, that period ends and the real work begins. There are a lot of cases when the love and affection fade away after a while. Therefore, people start to act cold toward each other.
It almost feels like a formal relationship instead of a loving one. Fixing this is one of the best answers to the question of how to fix a broken marriage.
4. Priorities
People only give the most attention to something that is at the top of their priority list. If you both have different priorities, then it will cause some problems. If one person does not put marriage as a top priority, then it will cause dissatisfaction, and fights will occur in a relationship.
5. Facing A Crisis
In life, there are bound to be some crises. Most of the time, people in the marriage fight through these crises together and get through them. There are some cases where a couple is not able to get through a crisis.
They eventually fall apart and the marriage eventually fizzles out. If one half does not support the other, the foundation gets weak and resentment increases.
How To Fix A Broken Marriage
Now that I have addressed some of the most common reasons for broken marriages. Let us look at some of the best ways how to fix a broken marriage.
1. Increase Communication
As discussed earlier, communication is the key to a relationship. Increasing communication and starting dialogues can be a huge step in how to fix a broken marriage. You should make it a point to be truthful and give honest feedback to each other.
This will make sure that nothing is unsaid. This will also make sure that you will get to know each other once again at a deeper and more intimate level.
2. Remember What Made You Fall In Love
Nostalgia is a very powerful thing. Remembering old things and memories will make you remember why and how you fell in love. Once you remember the things you used to do that made your partner happy, you can get back to that.
You can get back to the basics and try to fix your seemingly doomed marriage.
3. Identifying The Problems
Identifying the problems that are causing trouble in paradise is a great start. Once you have identified the problems, it gets infinitely easy to fix them. Even if the problems are a lot and seem unlikely to solve, it is not impossible.
As long as both of you are willing to put in the work, things will work themselves out.
4. Limit The Distractions
With time, there are a lot of distractions that can come into your marriage. These distractions can be both kids and careers. While it is completely okay to dedicate time toward them. They should not result in you neglecting your marriage and taking it for granted.
You should make it a point to dedicate time to your marriage as well. Go out on dinner dates and watch movies together. If your kids are old enough, you can also go on a second honeymoon to rekindle your marriage.
Doing this will show your appreciation towards the other and avoid a broken marriage.
5. Giving Your All
Committing to your marriage is something many people struggle with. If you’re wondering how to fix a broken marriage, you need to see if there is a commitment issue first. Have an honest conversation with your spouse.
Once you both are on the same page and want to commit fully, things get much easier. With fully committed partners, marriage is easier to save and enjoy.
6. Look Inside Yourself
Most of us have a tendency to blame others for common problems. Sure, it might be that the other person is also wrong. But, in most cases, a marriage breaks when mistakes are on both sides. You should also introspect and see if you are also doing something wrong.
Once you have figured out the mistakes you are making, you can try to fix them. This effect can also be contagious and your spouse may also realize his mistakes and fix them for the sake of saving the marriage.
7. Try To See The Positive About Your Partner
Many times, n the heat of the moment, we only see the negative in people. It is always easier to put all the blame on your spouse. But, you should also note the positives that your partner brings.
You can make a list of all the positives and negatives of your partner and evaluate them. Doing this will remind you of the things that made you choose them as your partner. This might give you a new perspective and reduce the tension a bit as well.
8. Knowing Each Other Once Again
When things are tense, you sort of forget one another. This is very normal in a strained relationship and causes a lot of problems. However, this can easily be avoided. All you need to do is to get to know each other once again.
How may you do that you ask? Just have honest conversations with each other. Isolate yourself from the rest of the world and try to understand each other once again. Who knows, you may see a side that was always hidden from you.
This can work wonders if you fully commit to the process.
9. Setting Ground Rules
Once you have started to rebuild the level of trust and started to understand each other again, it’s time to set some ground rules. These can be as simple as being honest and not hiding anything. You can also set a codeword that you can say and the other would have to be truthful.
This can avoid instances of just saying the right things and actually being honest.
Keep in mind though, setting ground rules does not mean that you put restrictions on each other. Setting restrictions, especially at such delicate times can have the opposite effect. This may increase the frustration and lead to resentment.
10. Getting Outside Help
There is a strange stigma attached to asking for help. In some cases, it is also considered a weak person’s move. I can assure you that it is in no way a weak move. No one understands how hard it is to acknowledge that you need help and to openly ask for it.
If you want to know, how to fix a broken marriage, who better to ask that than a professional? They are experts in resolving these issues and conflicts. Seeking help and doing marriage counseling is one of the if not most effective solutions to how to fix a broken marriage.
A therapist will poke around and will try to uncover all the hidden reasons why your marriage is not working. They will help you realize the things that are working and not working.
While it may be a long process, as long as both of you commit and decide to work, nothing is impossible.
Can Just One Person Fix A Broken Marriage?
Now that I have covered how to fix a broken marriage, let’s discuss something that is equally important. Can a single person fix a broken marriage?
As discussed above, a marriage usually breaks if both people make mistakes. Unfortunately, in my opinion, a marriage can not be fixed if it’s just one of you who is trying to fix it. Sure, you can try and give the other person everything that they ask for. This may also work for a while.
But, is that really a good marriage? Sacrifices have to be from both sides. Even if one person gives up everything, eventually, things are bound to turn sour. The resentment is bound to increase and that would most likely be the end of the relationship.
That is not to say that you can not take the first step. Many a time, people are afraid to take the leap and that way, no solution ever comes to light. So, you can take the first step and initiate the conversation. But, keep in mind that the work and efforts have to be from both sides or it will be a futile effort.
In The End
How to fix a broken marriage is a question that pops into our heads many times. Especially when things are rough, we all wish that there was a sure-shot method that would fix everything. Unfortunately, nothing like this exists. Everyone is different. Every marriage is different.
As a result, there is a need for constant work and efforts that can make sure that you can save your marriage. Communication is one of the most important steps in that. If you are not talking freely with each other, things are bound to not get right.
With this blog, hopefully, you are able to find the perfect solution to your problems are find the answer to how to fix a broken marriage.
